I've often heard people mention that the first child for any couple always gets the best stuff. They get the new crib. They get the new toys. They have a million and four photos taken their first week of life.
Like any person who didn't have any children, I didn't think that could possibly be true. Like any non-parent, I was arrogant. And I was wrong.
If you remember, we did buy a lot of stuff for Gene at yard sales. However, he did get a lot of new stuff as well. A new stroller. A new crib. A new car seat. The list goes on. Baby #2, on the other hand, is going to get an awful lot of hand-me-downs. And that's understandable. We have all of this gently-used baby gear in our basement, why on earth would we go buy brand new stuff?
I thought that's where this story would end.
And then I took a peek at my charts.
You see, both of my pregnancies have been planned. We decided in November 2010 that we wanted to start a family so I began charting. I was meticulous. I woke up at the same time every single morning and charted my signs. We conceived Gene on the second cycle. This is what that chart looked like:
I only missed a couple of days of temping and charted until I took my first pregnancy test.
This time things went a little differently. We had been talking about expanding our family but I had not been charting. I was nearly mid-way through my cycle so I decided I'd better start charting. I charted for a whopping five days before it indicated that I was ovulating. We decided to go for it and that was that.
As you can see, I stopped charting after that. Honestly, I kind of forgot about it. We had Michael home for a week and then enjoyed a nice, quiet Thanksgiving. It wasn't until I talked to a friend about pregnancy that I even remembered that I should buy a test. I went to the store, headed home and tested in the middle of the day.
I was kind of shocked that the test was positive. Very happy, but a little surprised. I was so lazy with my charting that I was certain we were out for the month.
So there you have it. Baby #2 is still incubating, but already he or she is getting less than 100%.
Did you do things differently with subsequent babies?
Honestly, with your first, you're so stressed, you want everything to be right. You want him/her to QUIT CRYING. You want to fix it all. You want it to be PERFECT. Then reality sets in. Baby #1 gets older, you give them less, because they require less. Or at least it seems that way. Then Baby #2 comes, and it's so.... easy? At least with the baby. #1 is going to be the challenge. But the baby? oh you've done the baby thing before, right? you KNOW it's going to be hard to get out of bed, but your body is totally on autopilot. Like forgetting you are driving and you realize you're pulling in the driveway? Yup, like that. So don't be fussed about capturing every single moment (although blogging or journaling about special ones is a must-do), but do take the time to sniff baby's lovely hair while he/she is eating, tickle the tummy, and so on.. you have so much more experience now, you can ease back and enjoy the view, just like when you drive home and forget where you are, you're just lost in it all! ps kids figure out pretty quick that hand me downs mean better stuff when you do get new things, no worries about that.
ReplyDeleteI was a lot better at storing and keeping the ultrasound pictures for the first one!
ReplyDeleteMy youngest two are only two years apart & yes, number 2 gets way less in some ways. I truly believe though that even though you give number 2 so much less in material things, you make up for it in other departments. You learn to loosen up with the 2nd, you have more patience with the 2nd I think & you truly enjoy the little things more because you know how quickly time will go!
ReplyDeleteI'm only 9 weeks at the moment, but in some ways, I feel for us, it's a bit of the opposite (at least as far as material things go!). My older son is 5 years old (will be 6 when baby comes along)...being a military family and moves being inevitable, we didn't keep hardly anything from my son. We literally have a few outfits, a moses basket and baby wrap. That's it! So already, we have to start from scratch...but with our son, we were also newlyweds and had absolutely nothing! We depended a lot on yard sales, etc for baby gear...which we will do this time as well, but our budget is still higher, which means nicer yard sale buys! My son's crib was a Craigslist freebie- not a horrible crib, but not my preferred style...this time, we had a friend sell us and entire nursery full of furniture, barely used for just $200...a sleigh crib in cherry, just the style I wanted. This baby is definitely going to have a better nursery and better baby gear starting out...though I do imagine that once baby gets older, we'll see that change...my son being an only child for so long has been spoiled on birthdays and holidays... something we won't be able to do with two little ones:)
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